Discovering Me

Hey, seastars. Today is going to be a little different. You see, I've been called horrible things since surfacing as a mermaid. I've been called a manatee, I've been called ugly, I've been compared to a whale. I've been told I shouldn't be a mermaid-but who can deny one's very nature? Something occurred to me recently while chatting with someone I'll probably never meet.

I've been compared to many massive things. Those people thought they could hurt me. Truth be told, I was hurt. Deeply. But now I can see the truth. I am not a manatee or a whale. I'm a ship. I am a graceful ship sailing my way down the stream of life. I am a strong, proud ship and though I may sail slowly at times, though a few lines may break- I cannot, will not be stopped by the waters around me. You see ships float in the water because they push it aside and glide through. If the water gets in, the ship sinks. I've been trying to teach myself the art of bailing. Of ridding myself of the toxic waters I've let in. And I am deeply sorry for the long silence, my personal life has been proving difficult for me to juggle. And I've been so hard on myself lately. I flooded my own mind with thoughts of quitting, deleting this blog. I've nearly drowned in thinking I don't deserve to take up your time when I can't stay consistent. Then I chatted with a stranger online and gave her the same advice I'm writing now, never let yourself sink.

You see, we can all be hard on ourselves. I know I've been my own stumbling block countless times. It's nothing to be ashamed of and it's certainly nothing to fear. I let myself become the water that was slowing down all of my progress. After I let all the water from cruel words get to me. Let me tell you, that was not fun sailing with so much. So, I've been reevaluating what I let in. I've been learning the art of bailing. Of throwing overboard every last drop I don't need in my life. I can't say I expect smooth sailing all the time. That would be boring! But I do believe I won't be so close to drowning anymore.

Keep Sailing,

-Seaspray

Thanks so much for reading! I hope you'll come back for more. And there will be more! I'll be starting a hair lightening treatment soon, it'sen a long time since the last DIY idea.
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