After the Holidays

Hey, seastars I'm sorry! I meant to post I was going to take a break during the holidays to focus on my family and I completely spaced. My usual blogging schedule will continue on January 2. I hope you all had a wonderful, safe holiday and I wish you the happiest of new years.

I do have a quick hair mask for you to try, this one is a bit messy. Personally, I'm not sure I'll use this one again, I dislike being sticky, but this mask was so effective I just had to tell you about it!

Take one part milk to two parts honey and whip the mixture together until you have a runny caramel colored fluid. I added a few drops of essential oil, the scent did not stick for longer than a day but it was a nice addition while I let the mask sit in my hair for a half hour. Surprisingly enough, this mask rinsed out without an issue! If you try this or any of my posted masks, make sure you tell me all about the experience in the comments.

I know this entry is short, I'm sorry, I'll leave you with this; you are never obligated to let anyone touch you for any reason, not because they are family, not because it's the holidays. Your body is your own and you make the rules about who enters your personal space. That's why it is called personal space! And if anyone makes you feel unsafe or uncomfortable, speak up and try to leave the situation. You are strong!

If you're interested in my mermaid content, check out my accounts on Facebook, Twitter, Google+, Instagram, and YouTube, I use the same handle Seaspray Mermaid.

See you in the next year!

Seaspray

Discovering Success in Failure

Hi, seastars. So far the growth hair mask is not working for me. It did make my hair wavy and shiny, both are fun side effects. I won't give up this project. I think we do that a lot. I know I have. You start something you're excited about, you do a lot of research, and when you get to the point you should see results they aren't what you expect. Sometimes we give up too early, or we forget to look at the process and learn. And if we find we didn't do anything wrong, we fail to see the positive side of failure. I was disappointed when I saw my hair is not growing like I expected. I used to have hair so long, people frequently asked if I had extensions. Let me tell you, I took a lot of pride in their surprised expressions when they learned I have never put extensions in my hair. I would love to have that length again and I had a lot of hope for this hair mask. I did everything right, I measured out the ingredients, mixed it well, let it sit, rinsed well. No results. I didn't step back and look at how healthy and wavy my hair looked. If you only look for the negative, that's all you'll ever find.

I find it difficult to stay focused on positive things in my life, often blaming myself for what goes wrong. This small experience with a hair mask actually opened my eyes to how negative I was becoming.  Yes, it is important to keep the rose color lenses off. But it's equally important to give yourself a break and rest in positivity. To rest in the unexpected results in your failure. I think we look at failure the wrong way. Failure isn't a bad thing, in fact, it's a tool. Alexander Fleming failed to clean his tools and discovered a life-saving medicine, penicillin. It's amazing what happens when you look for what went right, in any situation. And if you're like me and you blame yourself for something that you really don't have control over, be kind to yourself. Take a breath, step back and really look. And be honest. Is it really anyone's fault that ice forms at different rates? Is it really your fault there are spiders in your home?
 Yup, I got to a point where I was blaming myself for the spider on the ceiling. The positive to the spider on the ceiling (besides that it wasn't anywhere near me) was I knew I needed to look for access points and somehow cover them up. It sounds super corny, but there really is a silver lining to every rain cloud.

The most recent cloud for me is hair shorter than I want it, the silver lining? I haven't had such shiny hair in a little more than a decade. And who knows? If I keep up with the mask, maybe I'll see the results I want. There is always a positive spin to everything, just remember to be realistic. It is okay to be upset and disappointed. It is okay to not be happy! That 's normal. Give yourself time to notice and feel those feelings. And then find the positive. Alexander had a big mess in his lab, we all know the feeling of coming home and finding a mess. He decided to find a use for the mess and it saved and continues to save, so many lives.

Alright! That was a big rambly mess, and I hope you got something out of it. If you're new around here and want to know what mask I'm talking about, check out the blog post Discovering Self-Care. If you have an easy DIY self-care tip or learned how to find your silver lining, tell me all about it in the comments! I'll end this entry with a face mask I've had a lot of luck with. You'll need honey and cinnamon. I like to do this one right out of the shower. Combine enough honey to coat your face with about a tablespoon of cinnamon, mix them well! Then coat your face, avoiding your eyes (ouch) and hairline. I like to let mine sit until I'm done with the rest of my beauty routine (about 10 minutes), then I use a washcloth with warm water and small circles to rinse off the mask. What's left is fully exfoliated, glowing skin ready to take on the day. The powerful combo attacks acne by killing bacteria that contribute to inflamed pores. And, as a special bonus, cinnamon has astringent properties. That means shrinking pores!

Thank you for reading, seastars.

Have courage and be kind to yourself.

-Seaspray

Discovering New Routines

Hello, dear seastars. I've talked a bit about habits and how to rewire the brain. The next trick is to incorporate new, healthy habits into a manageable daily routine. Personally, I've always struggled with keeping up, I've noticed I give up when something interrupts my routine. I plan to change that about myself. How? I have no idea, I'm hoping that reporting to you will help. I do have an ideal routine in mind, in fact, I've planned this routine for weeks and still do not adhere to it. I've gotten in my own way of living how I want to live. Have you ever noticed that behavior? You want to do something and you know exactly how you want it done and it never happens. You become your own hurdle and stagnate. Eventually, whatever this new, exciting plan is dissipates and you find yourself back to square one. I've decided for myself, at some point I have to stop asking what's in my way and see I've become my own problem.

No more excuses for me! I've already started to adjust my sleeping pattern to help fit into my new routine. And I am determined to stick to it, regardless of any hurdles that may materialize in my path. I know there will be hurdles aplenty on this journey, most of which will be a direct consequence of my decisions. That said, anything worth doing should be done right.

Can I confess something to you? These changes I'll be making in my life scare me. I am a creature of habit and accepting change has never been easy for me. These changes will help me become a healthier person, inside and out. Over time, the routine will become a habit. I can tell myself these facts until I'm blue in the face, but that doesn't alleviate my fear. I can't even tell you why I'm scared. Maybe I'm afraid I'll become a better, stronger person? That reminds me of one of my favorite quotes. "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure...We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be?.." Marianne Williamson.

I love the challenge in that quote and I urge you, seastars, go and dare yourself to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous, and powerful. You are all of those things and more.

Tell me about how you deal with change in the comments. Do you have any tips or tricks you use to cope with bigger life changes?

Peace and joy.

Seaspray

Discovering Self Care

Hello, seastars! Today is about easy self-care actions you can take every day. I've been doing some of these just for a few days, and let me tell you the difference is astounding. In addition to simple self-care, I have a new hair mask for you, keep reading for the recipe.

Right then, I've been starting my day with a shower and washing my face. Personally, I've found just starting the day clean and fresh-faced has given me an amazing confidence boost. I wash my face with witch hazel and press a cold washcloth on my face to close my pores if I want to wear makeup, which is part two. I find myself wanting to do makeup when I'm running errands. Yes, we should all love ourselves for who we are and be comfortable in our own skin. Yes, we are all gorgeous folks. I like to wear makeup when I know I'll be in situations that will set off my anxiety. For me, makeup is like war paint and when I have sharp eyeliner and no dark circles under my eyes, I can take on the world. I don't wear makeup because I dislike my features, I wear it to feel awake and boost my confidence when I'll be in public. I have anxiety, crowds are intimidating, and I'm sensitive to loud sounds. Makeup helps. If makeup isn't for you, try a pair of killer shoes or a jacket that makes you hold your chin up. We are powerful! We are strong! Errands don't have to be scary!

I've had to adjust my sleep schedule a lot to accommodate this new addition to my routine, and honestly, I'm still working on it. The trick is to keep trying and to not give up. If you're really not a morning person, try finding an hour in the evening to do something you like. Read a favorite book, take a bath, maybe pick up a hobby. Something just for you that can be integrated into your day, you'll be amazed at the difference.

Part of my personal self-care is taking good care of my hair. I know, it might sound silly, we're all different and we all take pride in different parts of ourselves. I try to treat my hair to a mask once a week and this latest one I discovered allegedly encourages growth. Olive oil, coconut oil, honey (twice the amount as the two oils), and a single egg are combined and massaged into your roots and coated evenly down to your ends. I let mine sit for an hour wrapped in an old dollar store fashion scarf. While I wait for my masks to dry, I like to let my mind wander and enjoy aromatherapy either by candle or oil diffuser. An important tip to remember is to rinse this mask well with lukewarm or chilly water or you'll end up poaching the egg. Yikes! I get bored easily so I rock out to P!nk and rinse out the mask for a couple of songs, just to be safe. Then shampoo and condition normally. My hair is super thick so I had to shampoo my hair twice to get all of the oil out, make sure to really scrub or you'll come out looking greasy.

I'll keep you updated if this mask really promotes growth, so far my hair feels soft at the scalp but it did make my ends crunchy.

Thank for reading, seastars! What do you do to boost your confidence? Tell me about it in the comments!

Have a great day, you are fantastic!

Seaspray

You Came Back!

Thank you for coming back to my mad writings!


Procrastination has always been a massive pain in my tail. I always put off important things like making doctor appointments. Sometimes it’s out of fear, who likes phone calls!? Sometimes I just don’t have the energy or motivation to do things as simple as a load of laundry. Then I talk down to myself. It would be different if I wasn’t so lazy. I wish I was like Productive Polly over there with her amazing hair. Blah blah blah. If you do the negative talk too, stop it. We aren’t lazy and it’s a waste of time to play the comparison game.


The truth is, there is no easy way to beat procrastination. If you’ve found one, please for the love of all that is warm and fuzzy share your secrets. (It’s sorcery isn’t it?) Studies suggest human brains are wired for the easiest possible thing. And let’s get honest, what’s easier than ignoring the Chair of Laundry? Thankfully there is a way out. Rewiring the brain. Start with something small, folding the laundry as soon as it’s dry. Do that every single time you do laundry. Eventually it becomes a habit and you don’t procrastinate anymore. Procrastination is a habit we can all kick! I like to leave myself notes until the new habit is wired in, but a reminder in your phone will work.


Now, if you’re like me, you would rather wash the ceiling than talk to someone on the phone. For me, it’s anxiety. I don’t know why phone calls make me anxious. I did find a way around that too, for the rare times the internet fails. Does the name Pavlov ring any bells? His idea was to trigger a response through certain stimulation. Pavlov took dogs, rang a bell, and fed them. Eventually the dogs started to drool when they heard the bell because the bell meant feeding time. What I do is find some chocolate I can only have after I finish my phone calls. That’s right, I Pavlov myself. And it works. Now, please keep in mind this is not an immediate answer. Conditioning takes a long time. The key is to be consistent, another beast we’ll have to tackle on another day.


Thanks for reading, seastars! If you have any tips or tricks around procrastination, please leave a comment. I’d love to hear your ideas, and maybe try a few out.


Peace, Love, and Splashes,





Seaspray

Discovering New Habits

Hello seastars! While I don't have any DIY photos for you today, I am writing this post to let you know I will be blogging about my top secret recipes in between the normal posts.
I don't have any images today to show you just how magnificent the hair mask I use is, but stay tuned, I'll drop what you need at the end of the post.

Now on to the actual topic, new habits, Yikes, I know, stay with me. It takes roughly 21 days to form a habit. It is possible to control them! I like to use notes and phone reminders in the first week or so to nudge me in the right direction. I also remind myself it's okay to slip up, new behavior is new and the brain is wired for the path of least resistance. Too bad for my brain, my heart decided on the opposite path. I just don't know when to quit. You have to be kind to yourself. Tell yourself you are not what the negative voice in your head says you are. You define yourself. If you catch yourself slipping, take a breath! It's totally normal to have off days. I like to do one small thing to keep myself on track. A shower, hair or face masks, talking to other people. Progress does not always look like leaps and bounds. Progress is just moving forward! We can do this, seastars. One step at a time. One thing I always forget is to look back and see how far I've come. Sometimes the future is daunting and feels impossible. The truth is, I've come a long way to be where I am and I can only go forward. That's your truth too! Where ever you are in your life, you have a history that carried you here, that doesn't mean it defines you, it just means you've walked a walk, And look at all that progress! Look how far you've come! I'm proud of you and I believe in you.

Okay! I've rambled at you, and if you're still reading this, you've earned a treat. Being a mermaid, I spend a ton of time in the water, which results in not so luscious hair. Please remember, this mask does not reverse or cure any damage or split ends, but it does make a dent.

Go to your cupboard and pull out honey, coconut oil, and vinegar. Both kinds of vinegar work, I prefer white. Mix the three ingredients in equal parts until it's a nice, thick pile of goo. Work your mask into your roots and coat your strands to the ends. I like to add a little extra coconut oil to my ends. Let the mask sit for at least 30 minutes. I'm super extra and leave it for up to 6 hours. Once your time is up, give your hair a good rinse in the shower. Shampoo and rinse once to work the oil out, then shower normally. You can absolutely condition too, but it won't be necessary. Air dry for best results but if you're in a rush, I'd suggest a towel or T-shirt instead of a hair blower.

If you try the mask and love the results, tell me all about it! I love hearing from you, seastars.
What do you do when you need to make a new habit? Drop your tips and ideas in the comments!

Hang in there and be kind to yourself!
One step at a time, one day at a time.

Hugs!

Seaspray

Discovering an Intro

Hello, seastars! You can expect this blog to be about learning to love yourself and find confidence in the fact you (yes you, with the amazing smile reading this) are incredible. I’ll be posting easy ways to pamper yourself, take care of yourself, handle anxiety and depression, perhaps a few corny jokes along the way. Through all of this fresh content, you’ll also learn a lot about me. Feel free to ask me any questions, I just ask that you respect it if I refuse to answer, some things need to stay private.


So! Let’s get this party started. Hi, I’m Seaspray, I have a few (undiagnosed) mental illnesses and a full history of (ignored) trauma. I also have been ignoring a thyroid condition for an embarrassing amount of time, to the chagrin of my mother. I make this promise to you, dear seastars, I will see the necessary professionals to handle my various issues.


To wrap this up, I leave you with this: Never, ever listen to that horrible voice in your head telling you you’re not worthy, that you shouldn’t waste anyone’s time, that you’re undeserving and lesser than. Tell that voice to take it’s nasty self and shove it. Because you are worthy, and deserving, and equal, and amazing! Yes you are.


Starfish wishes and lots of kisses,





Seaspray.